Undescribed Prayers.

So, where do I begin? Really, with New Year gone and so much going on, my life is full! And thus, these requests...

I guess a good place to start would be tonight... which just happens to tie into India and such. First off, I felt really bad about my reaction when I heard somebody was going. I didn't mean that in a bad way at all, it just shocked me because that was a side I hadn't seen coming. So in that way, it's a really good thing she's going, because I really ought to get to know her better.

But on to the significant, leave-me-speechless stuff.

I think God has a sense of humor. With everyone. Me? I think He just loves to take me by surprise. Cause it happens a lot. OGN? Last summer, that was definitely not on the top of my list. And look what He did!

You'd think I would learn from that. But I didn't. On the two hour place ride back, I was already making plans. I desperately wanted to return to OGN. Since FSM has gone every year that I can remember, that wasn't an issue. Until months later, when I was talking to Lane and Mr. Denny. Come to find out that night, FSM wasn't taking a group to San Diego this year. No, instead, God twisted it a little. Right when I thought my dreams were 'crushed', Mr. Denny mentions that if you'd ever gone on OGN, you can help with United this year. I was told I had the chance to be a student leader in the beach witnessing track. Well, obviously, I made plans. That's on my list.

Then came Guatemala. I knew I would be doubling up on Spanish anyway, and I knew a lot of people who went last year. It sounded like a good deal, especially since my dad wants me to go on a mission trip to a Spanish speaking country at some point. I made plans.

Honestly, when India finally came up in conversation, my first thought was "Oh, that's cool. But I don't need to worry about that. I mean, there's no way. There's so much I could do. Not happening."

Can't you just hear God smothering a heaven-splitting laugh? It's almost like I'm on one of those shows where the audience knows something the characters don't. No joke.

That's when things started to get strange. At first, it wasn't anything huge. I knew one person planning on going... then two... then three. All three were from the OGN team. Not so weird. No big deal. Oh, the timing already works cause Mom and Dad will be home anyway? Cool.

So God decided to get my attention. I had been talking to someone about all three trips that morning, then India showed up in a class conversation. Huh. Okay. It brought back memories of the tsunami that hit India really hard when I was in first or second grade. With it came memories of all my grade school friends- all but one were Indian. The next day, someone was talking about it. At home, I was "youtubing" something with Mom, and it led to videos about that same tsunami that I remembered. I spent a couple hours that night watching it and thinking. The next Sunday, I happened to have free time and got talking with Joy, who felt called to India for life. She felt called in tenth grade, and she noticed because it started popping up everywhere. Even in her World History book.

Now it's even more extreme. One of my Indian friends just got a number where I can text her instead of calling. I started World History yesterday and today? We talked about India.

I had to think about this. It begged attention. I noticed that all the things that made me feel 'called' to Guatemala were either people planning on going, past trip stories, or something I had done to make it easier to go. All the Indian 'coincidences' were out of my hands. I had nothing to do with them.

Tonight, when you, Mrs. Jeanne, told us to pick a verse, my mind immediately went to 2 Corinthians 12:9-10~
 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Shannon Pere and Joy Williams had recently told me that if it's going to be my first third world, overseas trip, I might not be prepared. Most 'newbies' aren't prepared.

My whole life has been built around whether or not I think I can do something. I'm a perfectionist, so if I don't think I'm going to be good at it, I don't do it. I excel in what I do,  but only because I don't try much else. Christ's power is made perfect in weakness. In Guatemala, I would still be in my comfort zone. I'd know Spanish, and I feel like I would be relying more on what I know instead of trusting God to come through. I live like that. In India, where I have a few connections but I'm scared I'll fail, I am weak. I'm not comfortable. Whatever happens, it's not my doing- it's obviously His. Everyone will know that "I can't do this, I've never known how." So if anything happens, there's no doubt God is involved, and I can't take the credit. I can boast in my weaknesses, so His power can work, so when I tell the stories, everyone can see that when I am weak, He makes me strong.

Prayer is always accepted. By the way. :)